


And Bucky said, Fuck Your Gender Roles

by idontshaveforsher_yesyoudo



Series: the queer and wondrous life of peter parker [5]
Category: Captain America (Movies)
Genre: Gen, Gender Identity, Gender Non-Conforming Bucky Barnes, Getting Together, M/M, Memes, Queer Themes, Texting, and while i'm saying things that would freak out my grandparents: Be Gay And Do Crime, this is a STANDALONE
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-09-22
Updated: 2019-09-22
Packaged: 2020-11-02 11:46:22
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 5,537
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20735303
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/idontshaveforsher_yesyoudo/pseuds/idontshaveforsher_yesyoudo
Summary: Bucky, slurping iced coffee through a straw: Be Gay, Do Crime.





	And Bucky said, Fuck Your Gender Roles

**Author's Note:**

> listen. i hate the concept of gender (the one that cis people have, at least). i'm having a Gender Crisis(TM) atm. bucky would look fucking awesome in dark red lipstick. 
> 
> feedback/kudos/comments always much appreciated. 
> 
> this takes place after civil war in an universe where everyone eventually is (more or less) friends and marvel doesn't fuck up everybody's character arcs. also, an universe where everyone is Gay. Because I'm gay and I say so.

Once a week, Bucky has a standing appointment to get iced coffee with a teenager. This is how it happened:

After Bucky gets his triggers removed in Wakanda, there comes a point when he and his therapist agree that he has spent enough time shepherding goats and that it is time to get back to a city, and, preferably, New York.

He calls Steve immediately after deciding this, who has spent the last months along with Sam and the other Rogue Avengers, as they’re now called, schmoozing with all his contacts in governments, making amends with all the other Avengers, having tentative talks with Tony Stark, doing everything in his might to get themselves out of being wanted criminals in almost every country in the world.

Two days after he calls Steve, he gets a call from Natasha; they’re losing their status as Wanted War Criminals Slash Traitors to the US of A and are now Persons of Interest Under Surveillance for A While Until They’re Trusted Again.

Natasha tells him on the phone that she finds it incredibly amusing that the government thinks it can monitor ex-assassins and spies. She also tells him that she already got all them (which means herself, Bucky, Steve and Sam) an airy apartment in Brooklyn, and even though she tries to hide it, Bucky can hear in her voice that she’s kind of excited for this prospect of the four of them living together as roommates.

The apartment comes with four bedrooms, a big living room filled with chic but comfy furniture and an up-to-date kitchen. Sam complains about super soldiers being lazy asses and about all the weapons laying around in the most random places but still cooks breakfast most mornings, Steve sets up an easel in his bedroom on which he paints colourful things he sees during his regular outings in the city, Natasha drops in on an irregular basis and leaves mint-chocolate ice cream in the freezer and red hair everywhere else.

And Bucky, well, he doesn’t really leave the apartment for the first few weeks, scared of what will happen once he enters the outside world, until, one day, Sam stages an intervention and drags him to a café for iced coffee.

(_Iced __coffee _is a concept that’s inherently weird to him, but he forgets all of his doubts once he actually tries it. It’s fucking awesome and he never wants to drink anything else.

This leads to Sam staging another intervention two weeks later in which he declares that iced coffee is forbidden in the apartment and that everyone living there needs to eat at least one (1) solid meal per day that is Not Iced Coffee. Bucky agrees under the condition that he is allowed to eat said meal sitting on the fire escape in a nest of blankets.)

(All this time, Steve and Bucky very carefully tiptoe around the subject of their shared past, because there’s no real manual for dealing with a situation like _we-were-best-friends-and-then-lovers-and-then-we-both-got-frozen-and-one-of-us-is-brainwashed-and-half-his-memory-is-gone_. It’s very clear Steve still loves him, but it’s also very clear that neither of them is really ready for their relationship to go back to how it used to be back in the forties, Bucky least of all.

So while they fall back into a more or less easy dynamic of friendship, they avoid any topic of love and relationships like the devil. His therapist doesn’t really approve because she’s all in favour of something called _communication_. Natasha and Sam seem to find it incredibly amusing.)

* * *

**Natasha**: did you eat my mint-choc icecream

**Me**: no. why?

**Natasha**: i know what you did

**Natasha**: if i were you id be worried for my life

**Me**: how do you know it wasn’t sam or steve?? or a dog??

**Natasha**: theyre too scared of me to eat my ice cream

**Me**: what are you gonna do about it??

**Me**: nat????

...

**Me**: how the hell did you manage to sneak into my bedroom, bleach my eyebrows and shave my beard without me waking up?????????

**Natasha**: ha

**Natasha**: you look better without beard anyway

**Natasha**: it was starting to look dumb

**Me**: fuck you.

* * *

Over time, Bucky starts leaving the apartment more and more, sometimes even on his own, and one fine day, Steve takes him along to Stark Tower to his weekly meeting with Tony, as he calls Stark, discussing Avengers-related business.

Arriving there, they find Stark in a lab bigger than their apartment, sitting with a teenager and working on some kind of robot-thing. His inner nerd wants to freak out about how cool the lab is and how much he loves future technology, but he’s more focused on steadying his breathing and reminding himself what his therapist and him discuss in their regular skype sessions, that he’s not what Hydra made him do, that it’s not his fault that he killed Stark’s parents, that Stark and him actually have to _talk _if they want to sort out their messy relationship.

Stark takes one look at them, flinches, then waves a hand at Bucky. “One day soon, the two of us are gonna sit down and have a long chat about our issues, preferably with a lot of alcohol. But that day is not today, so you can go hang with Pete here while we do the boring Avengers stuff.”

Bucky looks at this _Pete_, who is about fifteen years old, and seems to barely be able to contain himself in face of _Captain America_. The boy bounces up from his place at the workbench and says,

“Hi, Mister Captain Rogers, Sir, Sergeant Barnes, Sir, it’s so cool to meet you, um, I’m Peter Parker, hi!”

Steve looks at him with an amused grin. “Hi, Peter. Call me Steve.”

Peter blushes. “Yes, sir, Steve, sir.”

“Should I be concerned that you love him more than me?” Stark asks.

Peter blushes even more and stammers, “No, Mr. Stark, don’t worry, I’d never – “

“Relax, kid.” Stark’s smile is teasing, but also incredibly soft. “Now, you go off with Barnes and get some coffee or whatever, be back in an hour.”

Bucky nods at Stark, claps Steve’s shoulder, then leads the way out of the lab for Peter to follow. In the elevator, he feels the corners of his mouth tilt up at Peter’s barely contained energy and the nervous glances he keeps sending Bucky.

“Iced coffee?”

Peter lights up and starts vibrating at an even higher speed than before.

(If that is even possible.)

“Definitely, sir, Mr. Barnes!”

“Call me Bucky.”

They get iced coffee and walk through a small park around the corner from Stark Tower and Peter rambles on about some science project he’s doing for school with the help of Stark.

At one point, he stops and apologises for boring Bucky, but Bucky asks him to explain something about the way the robot-thing is supposed to work because he really is a nerd himself, and Peter launches back into explanations.

An hour later, they both are surprised at how quickly time passed, and when they say goodbye at the steps of Stark Tower, where Steve is already waiting for Bucky, Bucky can’t help but smile at Peter in a way he rarely does, nowadays.

“It was fun hanging out with you. You’ll have to let me know what your teacher thought of the project.”

Peter grins back at him and says, “We can get iced coffee again!”

Bucky bites back a laugh. “Sure we can, kid.”

Peter throws him a sloppy salute and hops up the stairs.

When Bucky turns to face Steve, his friend is already looking at him, a small smile on his face.

“Haven’t seen you laugh like that in a while,” he says. (He says it casually, as if _in a while_means _a few weeks_and not _roughly eighty years_)

Bucky reaches up to ruffle Steve’s hair. Today is a good day.

(It doesn’t last, of course.

As soon as they get home, Bucky crashes, hardly leaving his room for the next week, Sam and Steve periodically bringing him food where he is bundled up under a heap of blankets in the corner between a wall and his wardrobe.

When he finally emerges for the first time without a minimum of three blankets surrounding him, Steve is waiting for him with a grin. He shows him his newest painting: an incredibly photo-realistic cup of iced coffee sitting on a park bench, accompanied by a fat cat.

Bucky almost smiles.)

* * *

Two weeks later, he gets a text from an unknown number, which immediately sets all his senses to high alert.

(The only numbers saved in his phone are Steve, Sam, Shuri, his therapist, and Natasha’s current number. That is, if she hasn’t gotten a new one again, which happens about every other week.

Also, the number of the pizza place around the corner that lets you order via text. Priorities.)

**Unknown**: hey do you wanna get some iced coffee again next week ?

**Unknown**: oh this is peter by the way

**Unknown**: peter parker. from mr.stark ?

**Unknown**: i got ur number from mr.steve last time he was at the lab !!

Bucky relaxes as the stream of texts come in. He changes the contact’s name, then replies.

**Me**: Hi, Peter, sure! we can meet up when steve comes to talk to stark again?

**Peter**: cool sounds good !!

* * *

So they meet up again that week and Peter tells him all about how cool it is that he got a hundred percent on his robot-thing assignment.

And suddenly, it’s a standing appointment: once a week, Bucky accompanies Steve to Stark Tower, picks up the kid, and gets iced coffee with him. They try out every coffee shop around the block of Stark Tower (of which there are a lot of), then move out to try different ones that they read on Yelp about. There’s an ongoing challenge as to who can find the coffee shop with the weirdest interior design, and so far, Bucky is leading with one that had its entire counter set on a wall of skulls.

(He isn’t sure if they’re real skulls or just very realistic looking plastic ones, but he really, really doesn’t want to know.)

They talk about a lot of different things. Most of the time, though, is spent with Peter catching Bucky up on _pop culture _and _memes _and _gen-Z-humour_, as Peter calls it. Bucky is both delighted and slightly concerned to find that today’s youth’s humour isn’t all too different from what he used to find funny when growing up, all absurd and nihilistic.

(One time, Peter tells him about the workload of homework his teachers have given him over the weekend and ends his rant by dropping his head on the table of the coffee shop they’re sitting in and saying, “Man, I wanna kill myself.”

And, without thinking about it, Bucky, true to his Great Depression Brooklyn upbringing, replies “Do ya have your own gun or do you wanna borrow mine?”

Peter stares at him, and Bucky stares back, mortified at the fact that he just _offered a__fifteen-year-old kid a gun to kill himself with_.

Then Peter bursts into giggles, and Bucky smirks, and Peter says, “Man, either I’m doing really well teaching you gen-Z-humour or you’re just a natural.”

“Kid, I lived through the great depression and was a soldier in World War two. My generation basically invented nihilism.” He pauses, then says, “Just maybe don’t tell Stark I offered you a gun to kill yourself. Don’t know how he’d take it.”

Peter giggles some more. It’s adorable.)

* * *

**Me**: _1 Attachment_

**Me**: Big Mood

**Stebe**: Bucky, why the fuck is that just a picture of a fat pigeon sitting in a heap of leftover fries?

**Me**: Steve. it’s fat. it looks fat. it still wants more fries even though it already is fat. its very relatable steve get with the times

**Stebe**: oh.

**Stebe**: I guess that really is a Big Mood.

* * *

One week later finds Peter and Bucky in an ocean-based coffee shop while rain pours down outside.

Peter is swiping through the pictures on his phone as him and Bucky rate the outfits of different celebrities at the Oscars that took place the past weekend. Most of Peter’s comments are about how boring the men’s suits are, and most of Bucky’s are about how it’s less scandalous now to wear dresses with wide cleavage compared to the reaction they got back in the day when Bucky used to read the reviews of the show the day after in the paper. Also, the men’s suits really are boring.

Then, Peter throws him a weird look that Bucky can’t quite pinpoint (nervous?) and swipes to another photo.

Bucky has to hide his surprise when he sees it. It’s of a man in a tux on top and a wide black skirt below, smiling at the camera.

Peter says, “That’s Billy Porter, he wears dresses to red carpets sometimes.”

Bucky squints at it. Once the surprise has passed, he realises that it’s a pretty cool outfit.

“That neckline doesn’t really fit the rest of the dress.” He can feel Peter’s eyes on him but ignores it. “But apart from that, finally a man who wears something exciting.”

When he looks up, Peter is grinning at him.

* * *

**Peter**: hey bucky so um…. i just wanted to say thanks for being so chill about the pic i showed you today ?

**Peter**: like i know you were born a while ago but like,, its cool that youre cool with men in dresses and stuff.

**Peter**: sorry ignore this if its weird

**Me**: kid. you know i’m literally gay right?

**Me**: like, i grew up in the queer part of Brooklyn as a gay man. i went to gay bars. i have seen men in dresses before. of course i’m chill with it.

**Peter**: ksdkjfkdjfkdjf youre gay ?? so that rumor is true ??????

**Me**: yeah it is. I’m just not really used it not being a problem anymore, that’s why I don’t talk about it much in public

**Peter**: holy shit this is the best day of my life,,

**Peter**: what about mr. steve ? is he gay too??

**Me**: we didn’t have a name for it back then but by todays terms steve id’s as bisexual.

**Peter**: oh my godnjfdnkfdkjfkfke

**Peter**: so you and him are…

**Me**: it’s complicated.

**Peter**: oh. sorry.

**Me**: don’t be.

**Peter**: I’m queer too btw. pansexual. also trans if u know what that means.

**Me**: course I do. did my reading after I came back, didn’t i?

**Peter**: does that mean I can educate u about queer culture now ????

**Me**: sure

**Peter**: best. day. of. my.life

* * *

The week after that, Peter arrives at their coffee meeting with his nails painted pink.

Bucky looks at the way the cashier at this week’s chosen coffee shop accepts the money Peter hands him and doesn’t look anything but bored when he gives him back his change. He keeps watching literally _no-one_reacts to his nails as Peter carries his drink to their seats.

(No iced coffee for the kid today, because it’s March and freezing and while Peter does have a death wish, even he doesn’t go as far as to order iced coffee in this kind of weather.)

(The same cannot be said about Bucky. Bucky does have a death wish as well, and unlike Peter, he doesn’t draw the line at getting an iced coffee in the middle of a snowstorm. He fucking _relishes _the irony.)

And as Peter rambles on about his current favourite TV-show, Bucky’s eyes are drawn to his bright nails where they are clasped around a mug.

Bucky decides that he really likes the future.

* * *

**Me**: so to continue our conversation from earlier, if I were to send you this vine…

**Me**: <https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JFhqORL1cJs>

**Stebe**: coming back from a bar in full makeup, drunk and crying? Big Mood.

**Me**: Very Big Mood

**Me**: I feel like you did that a few times back in the day, didn’t you?

**Stebe**: Yeah. We used’ta go to the queer bars in the neighborhood and sometimes someone there’d paint my face. And I got drunk so damn easily back then so you usually had to carry me home without any of the neighbors seeing us. But it was always good fun.

**Me**: oh yeah I think I remember. also, vague memories of you in a dress?

Stebe: Oh totally, remember our neighbors Sinead and Tina? I got one of their dresses that got too small in the wash and wore it sometimes around the apartment. You taught me how to dance in that dress.

Me: hm. that was fun. if we did that today we wouldn’t have to hide like that

**Stebe**: The future is fucking great, isn’t it.

**Me**: hell yeah it fucking is

* * *

On a rainy Thursday afternoon in March, Bucky goes into the store that’s at the corner of their block that is somehow always opened and has everything you need whenever you need it, even if the entire shop is only about as big as Bucky’s own bedroom.

He snoops through the food section and gets himself some gummy bears and a can of vanilla coke (he fucking loves the future), then picks up cherry chewing gum for Steve (Steve fucking loves the future), and slowly but surely makes his way over to the beauty section.

There’s mascara and lip-gloss that he recognises from growing up with his sisters, and red lipstick that looks almost like the shade Peggy used to wear (his hand lingers for a moment too long over the golden tube), lots of other things that he has no clue what they are for, and, of course: nail polish.

There are about twenty different shades of nail polish on the shelf, and as he stands there, contemplating over the colours, a voice next to him says,

“I’d go for the teal if I were you.”

If he weren’t a master assassin, he would have jumped about three feet in the air.

There’s a small girl standing next to him with a lollypop sticking out of her mouth. He guesses she’s the owner’s daughter.

“What?” He asks.

“Of course, the black one would go with the broody emo look you’ve got going on, but teal would really make your eyes pop.” The girl sticks the lollypop back in her mouth.

Bucky looks down at her, then at the selection before him, then down again.

“Alright,” he says and takes one of the teal polishes from the shelf.

The girl grins.

“Good choice.”

At home, Bucky takes the small container out of the pocket of his jacket, takes off his boots, puts on some swing music.

(Via his iPhone, not a fucking gramophone like Peter keeps saying. He might have been born almost a century ago but he’s not a fucking grandpa yet. He can keep up with technology just fine.)

Turns out, being an assassin does have its perks, because even though he hasn’t done this before, he hardly messes the strokes of the brush up as he paints his nails, slowly, meticulously.

Steve comes home from the gym about half an hour later and finds him with his tongue between his teeth, squinting at his thumb as he applies a second layer.

Bucky looks up at him and his determination wavers for a moment when he realises that Steve might not be the biggest fan of men painting their nails, but then he realises that this is _Steve_he’s thinking about, and Bucky has yet to find a topic which Steve is prejudiced about.

Bucky grins and holds up the hand that’s done already to show Steve, and Steve grins back at him even wider.

“Looks swell,” he says.

Bucky inspects his hand himself. It really does look _swell_.

“Wanna go out to get dinner later?” He asks, for once acting on a whim.

(It’s the first time that it’s _him _and not _Steve _initiating going out together. He ignores the flutter in his stomach when his mind catches on with his mouth and realises that this sounds awfully like asking Steve out on a date.)

The smile that spreads over Steve’s face at the suggestion is brighter than a thousand suns.

Steve disappears into his room to take a shower and Bucky finishes his nails and an hour later finds them both dressed and ready to go out.

They get dinner at the Chinese place around the corner.

Steve talks about his day and the dog he saw at a park yesterday and throughout the evening, seems thoroughly transfixed by Bucky’s hands, by the colour painted onto his nails.

Bucky talks less, about something funny that happened the last time he saw Peter and the cat he saw in a back alley and as he’s swinging his chopsticks around and his other hand rests on the table Steve reaches out, taking it in his.

Bucky stops mid-sentence, stares at their intertwined hands.

He hadn’t even realised that painting the nails of his prosthetic might be weird, but it seems like it doesn’t even matter because it’s his left hand that Steve is holding.

He looks at Steve, who’s face seems stoic, hiding all emotions, unless you’re someone who’s known him for about a century, in which case you’d notice the slight twitch of his mouth displaying nerves.

(Luckily for Bucky, he has know Steve for about a century. He notices the twitch.)

He smiles and squeezes Steve’s fingers.

And just like that, the gates to heaven open and Steve’s entire face lights up.

(Bucky decides not to tease him for his red tinted cheeks. It’d be hypocrisy.)

They finish dinner with smiles on their faces.

* * *

**Sam**: what put you and Steve in such a good mood?

**Me**: wouldn’t you like to know

**Sam**: as a matter of fact, I would. Steve’s room is next to mine and he’s been listening to corny love songs from the thirties all night. It’s annoying.

**Me**: what kind of songs??

**Sam**: something about dancing cheek to cheek?

**Sam**: this one <https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NzSxvyX3QfA>

**Me**: ah. That is schmaltzy as fuck.

* * *

When Peter sees Bucky’s (by now slightly chipped) nail polish, his smile reaches from one ear to the other.

He holds up his own hand (purple nail polish this week) and Bucky high-fives him.

Both of them grin.

Then Peter says, “So, now that know you’re a fellow queer who hates gender roles with a passion, let me tell you about men wearing makeup.”

* * *

**Me**: what is our stance on makeup?

**Natasha**: neutral

**Natasha**: why

**Me**: specifically men wearing makeup. is that something the Former Russian Assassins Association can get behind?

**Natasha**: we will have to work on that name bc FRAA sounds dumb

**Natasha**: but of course

**Natasha**: fuck gender roles.

**Me**: my thoughts exactly.

* * *

Bucky buys himself lipstick.

At first, it’s a more or less neutral one, barely pigmented, just tinting his lips slightly pinker than they usually are.

The test run goes great because Steve can’t stop staring at his lips (even if he thinks he does so stealthily), Sam frowns at him several times during the day without being able to pinpoint what changed about his appearance (not so stealthily), Natasha sends a rare grin his way when she sees him for the first time.

The next shade he buys is not only slightly darker, but a lot so. The dark red colour is harder to apply because every mistake is visible, but here, once again, his assassin training has its perks because he doesn’t make too many mistakes in the first place.

He applies it in the bathroom he shares with Natasha and hesitates a few minutes, fussing with his hair and his sweater and looking in the mirror way too many times to check if the lipstick is still perfect. Then he takes a deep breath and figures that it can’t be scarier than getting drafted to go to war.

(Even though it kind of feels like it is.)

But then he opens the bathroom door and heads outside, almost bumping right into Natasha, who barely noticeably raises an eyebrow, then nods.

“Looking good, Barnes.”

He grins at her and makes a move in her direction, but her glare stops him in his tracks.

“Don’t even think about it.”

They stare at each other for a moment, then he lunges towards her and she lunges backwards, trying to escape the colour of his lips.

They tumble onto the floor, roll down the hallway, almost crash into the couch, somersault over its backrest until she is under him with no way to escape (not that she’s trying all too hard) and he can pepper kisses across her face, leaving mark after mark after mark.

He’s laughing, and she is actually _giggling _and both of them let go of each other, panting, still exhaling little laughs, until they both slowly turn their heads into the same direction to find both Sam and Steve standing in the doorway, staring at them.

Then Bucky turns his head to look down at her with what must be horribly smudged lipstick, and Natasha turns her head to look up at him with her face covered in dark red kisses, and they burst out into laughter again.

(Afterwards, once they collect themselves, they go to clean themselves up and return to the living room with matching lipstick this time. Sam raises an eyebrow. Steve stares at Bucky’s lips. Bucky grins at Natasha, who in turn winks at him.)

(Then, Bucky says, “Anyone wanna watch Stranger Things with me? I’m on season two but I can start over if you haven’t seen it yet.”

Sam grumbles something about how much he _hates living with weird-ass superheroes and assassins _and how _watching television at three in the afternoon is weird as fuck _and that he’s _gonna go make popcorn for everybody_.

Steve tentatively sits down on the sofa and Natasha cuddles up against his shoulder. Bucky constructs a heap of blankets in the other corner of the sofa, leaving just a hand width of space between him and Steve. Sam sits down next to Natasha and hands out popcorn and bickers with Steve about the volume of the TV and Bucky throws gummy bears that Natasha miraculously precured from somewhere at everyone and then the first episode starts and everyone quiets down except for the occasional giggle.)

(Steve only stares at Bucky’s lips half of the time.)

* * *

**Stebe**: hey

**Me**: why are u texting me at three in the morning.

**Stebe**: Why are you still awake??

**Stebe**: Just wanted to tell you that I really liked your lipstick today.

**Me**: thankssssss

**Stebe**: :)

**Me**: oh god who taught you emojis.

**Stebe**: Nat

**Me**: of course. Now go the fuck to sleep

**Stebe**: ?? Okay. But you too.

* * *

Peter takes Bucky to a cat café and Bucky fucking loves it. There are about five cats crawling on his shoulders and sitting in his laps and it’s a kind of touch that he doesn’t mind, not one bit.

They talk about random things, the latest Avengers gossip and what Bucky and Nat got up to on their last Former Russian Assassins Association Outing (they’re still working on the name) and new music that Bucky should definitely listen to.

“Sam Smith!” Peter blurts out at one point, and Bucky raises an eyebrow, waiting for him to tell him who or what that means.

“You should really listen to their music!” Peter continues but doesn’t really elaborate.

So, Bucky lifts one of the small cats off his shoulder, sets it down on his leg and asks, “Are they, like, a pop band or something?”

“No, they’re like…” Peter purses his lips, then says, “Well, they’re a singer who does great pop, mostly slow, you should check them out!”

Bucky frowns. “Why are you talking about them with neutral pronouns? Do you not know if it’s a guy or a gal?”

“No, it’s like… they recently posted something on twitter asking everyone to use neutral pronouns because they’re non-binary. Like, neither man nor woman.”

Suddenly, Bucky’s mind flashes to memories of people in queer bars in the thirties that he couldn’t exactly pinpoint to one gender, wearing suits but long hair or dress shirts with a fuckton of frills. He thinks he gets the concept.

“Okay,” he says, “I’ll check them out then.”

His counterpart’s eyebrows rise up. “Wait, no further explanation needed?”

He shrugs. “No, I think I get the general idea of it. I’ll probably do some googling when I get home.”

Peter’s lips silently form ‘_googling’_, then he says, “How come you’re more open and easy-going than most people born recently?”

Again, Bucky raises his shoulders in a shrug. “No idea. General assholery?”

Peter grins. “Anyway, what were you telling me about the FRAA?”

“Oh, last time we went make-up shopping. Got matching lipsticks.”

“You know, sometimes, I don’t know if you’re making fun of me or if you’re really just that cool.”

Bucky pulls out his phone and scrolls through it until he finds the selfie him and Natasha took in the changing room of one of the stores they went to on their last outing, scandalising the sales assistant by going into the same cabinet. Both of them had picked out ridiculous neon pink blouses and tiny sunglasses and were wearing the same shade of pink on their lips (different to the one on the blouses).

Peter stares at the picture, then at Bucky, then back at the picture. “Why would you show me this? What about your reputation?”

His voice is incredulous.

Bucky grins.

“Don’t worry. No one will ever believe you.”

Peter’s eyes widen.

“Oh, you’re evil.”

“I was a fuckin’ Russian Assassin. ‘Course I am.”

* * *

**Sam**: who of you assholes ate my last cookies???

**Natasha**: not me

**Stebe**: Me either.

**Me**: the fuck Sam are you okay ??

**Sam**: ??

**Me**: last night you stumbled in at like three, shoved the cookies in your mouth then passed out in 0.5secs on the couch.

**Me**: idk what you were drinking all evening with your college friends but I want some

**Sam**: ?? I woke up in my bed??? How did I get there???

**Natasha**: lmao

**Me**: I carried you there

**Sam**: oh.

**Sam**: thanks bro.

**Me**: don’t worry about it

**Me**: bro.

**Natasha**: aw.

**Stebe**: What is going on.

* * *

After Steve and Bucky spent months, years even, pining over each other and avoiding the topic of Relationships™, it suddenly all comes to an end really quickly. This is what happens:

Steve and Bucky watch a movie. (Star Wars, because Steve hasn’t seen it yet. Bucky doesn’t really care about the movies other than defending the obvious fact with his life that _Luke Skywalker is definitely gay_.)

They’re alone in the apartment. (Sam and Natasha both ducked out of the traditional Friday evening movie night for mysterious reasons.)

Bucky finds the fight scenes boring and decides to watch Steve instead. (Steve’s hair looks soft and he wishes he could touch it, card his hands through it.)

Steve turns to look at him. (Bucky wonders how his eyes can look so incredibly fucking blue.)

Steve’s eyes flick down at Bucky’s dark red lips. (Bucky might have applied this colour specifically for this occasion.)

(His plan worked.)

(They kiss.)

They kiss, and then they make out, and by the time Sam comes home, they’re on the couch with Bucky’s head in Steve’s lap, hair tousled, both of their lips tinted red, both of them wearing grins that threaten to split their faces in two.

Sam takes one look at them and exclaims, “Thank Fuck you figured your shit out!”

Bucky winks at him.

Steve blushes.

(It’s fucking adorable.)

* * *

**Peter**: not to be weird and stuff but like..

**Peter**: first of all,,, great lipstick today !!!!! fuck gender roles !!!!

**Peter**: second of all,, was that,,,,, a hickey,,,,, ??

**Me**: first of all. Thanks. Big Mood™, as the kids say.

**Me**: second of all, none of ya business.

**Me**: but if you have to know. Yes.

**Me**: you could say I was being.. Patriotic this weekend.

**Peter**: ………. Are you saying you and ….,,,,, ?????

**Me**: exactly. Isn’t life fucking great.

**Peter**: kdkdjfkdjkdf

**Peter**: ,, that explains why you were glowing today. Fucking Legend.

* * *

(Bucky wears a dress for the first time a few months later.

Natasha gets it for him for his birthday, custom-made in a cut typical in the thirties, dark red with matching heels and a lipstick in the same shade. He doesn’t know how she got is measurements but also really doesn’t _want _to know. She’s scary as fuck and he’s _so lucky_ to be her best friend.

Steve takes him out dancing to a swing club, wearing a nice tight white dress-shirt because the guy doesn’t own anything that’s _not _skin-tight. Bucky suspects that he knows the effect his clothing has on people. Steve just smirks and spins him around, both of their movements a lot more coordinated than they used to be when they were younger.)

(The way Steve looks at Bucky hasn’t changed at all.)

(The future is fucking great.)

**Author's Note:**

> listen, sam smith and billy porter are fucking great. also, steve listening to the ella fitzgerald version of 'cheek to cheek' ? fucking GAY and ICONIC.
> 
> ( the title was gonna be a lyric from the song but then i decided that like ..... no )


End file.
